Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Belvilla Awaits in Cetraro, Italy!
Escape to Paradise: Cetraro Edition - (Or, My Italian Whirlwind That Didn't Quite Whirl)
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because I just stumbled out of "Escape to Paradise" (their words, not mine… yet) in Cetraro, Italy, and I've got opinions. Lots of them. This ain't your perfectly polished travel blog; this is the raw, slightly jet-lagged truth, complete with questionable decisions and a love-hate relationship with Italian coffee.
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Escape to Paradise Cetraro Review: Belvilla Italy, Accessibility, Spa, Restaurants, Pool, Amenities, Hotel Review, Wheelchair Accessible, Italy Travel, Cetraro Accommodation, Best Hotels Italy, Family Friendly Hotels, Spa Hotels, Luxury Travel, Reviews.
Let's Dive In (Headfirst, Because Why Not?)
First off, the name's a bit ambitious, isn't it? "Paradise"? I'm thinking less "Garden of Eden" and more "Well-Appointed Holiday Apartment with a Pool." But hey, I'm here, I'm caffeinated (slightly), and ready to dissect this Italian adventure.
Accessibility: A Mixed Bag, Like My Dinner Plate
Okay, listen up if you're looking for wheelchair accessibility. They say they have facilities for disabled guests. Say. I didn't personally need it, but I saw the elevator. It seemed…functional. Not exactly gleaming, but probably getting the job done. The overall feeling was that they tried, but you might want to double-check specifics before you commit. I'd give it a tentative thumbs up and a side-eye.
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges: This one I cannot confirm.
Food, Glorious, Potentially Problematic Food
The food situation? A rollercoaster. Let's start with the good stuff.
Restaurants & Dining: The a la carte restaurant? Worth a visit. Actually, scratch that, go there. The pasta dishes were… chef's kiss (okay, maybe not that dramatic, but seriously good). International cuisine in restaurant was a delight. The vegetarian restaurant was a godsend, especially after a week of purely meat-based meals. Breakfast [buffet] was a decent spread. And yes, there was coffee/tea in restaurant – essential fuel for surviving Italy. I can't lie, the Asian cuisine in restaurant was not bad. Poolside Bar: I spent a good chunk of time here. The poolside bar was a lifesaver, especially when battling the midday sun and the existential dread of not knowing Italian. Happy Hour: The Aperol Spritz? Chefs kiss! I almost never left.
Now the not-so-good:
The breakfast takeaway service was a bit chaotic. One day, I was offered a single soggy croissant and a lukewarm coffee. Another, I practically had to wrestle a waiter for a second piece of fruit. Very up and down. I found desserts in restaurant to be delicious, but they needed a bit more variation. Breakfast in room and Room service [24-hour] were also a bit inconsistent.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking - A Deep Dive (Into My Stomach)
Let's be honest, I spent a significant portion of my time eating. And drinking. And occasionally snacking. The Bar was a solid performer, the perfect place to decompress with a glass of local wine. And there was free bottle of water – a small detail, but a welcome one.
And the less fun stuff:
The meals weren't all created equal, I'll be honest. I had high hopes for the salad in restaurant, but let's just say it wasn't the highlight of my day. The Soup in restaurant was a bit of a gamble. Some days it was amazing, others… well, let's just say I learned a valuable lesson about trusting my instincts.
Cleanliness & Safety: Sanitized or Just… Hasty?
This is where things got interesting (read: slightly alarming). They claimed a lot about cleanliness. Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Rooms sanitized between stays, Shared stationery removed. All sounds great, right?
Well, I'm going to be brutally honest. The "sanitized" room felt… well, it felt like someone had waved a bottle of bleach vaguely in the air. I'm not sure about some of the details. They have Daily disinfection in common areas, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, and that's good. But the overall impression was a bit rushed.
Spa, Wellness, and The Quest for Relaxation (Or Attempting To…)
Okay, here’s where things get interesting (and I mean, really interesting). The Swimming pool? Gorgeous, with amazing views. I spent a good portion of my time there, just floating and pretending I had no responsibilities. Pool with view, yeah, they nailed that one.
The spa area? Cue dramatic music. I booked a body scrub and a massage. The body scrub was… vigorous. Let's just say I emerged feeling like a freshly polished table. The massage, though… chef’s kiss again! The masseuse (a tiny woman with hands of steel) worked wonders, kneading out the knots that were the result of too much pasta and not enough sleep. I didn't get the body wrap, maybe next time.
The Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom all seemed very nice.
Things to do and ways to relax:. The Gym/fitness was not my cup of tea.
Rooms and Amenities: Comfort with a Touch of… Quirks
Honestly, the rooms were decent. Air conditioning was a godsend. Blackout curtains helped with the early morning sun. The bed was extra long which was great. The Free bottled water. I was given a complimentary tea.
But then there were the quirks. The bathroom phone was… well, it looked like it was from the 80s. I didn't dare touch it. And the window that opens… required a degree in engineering to operate.
Getting Around & Other Useful Tidbits
They have Airport transfer which was useful. Car park [free of charge] which was essential when you are traveling. I couldn't get the hang of driving on the narrow roads, but taxis were available. The taxi service was a lifesaver at times.
Services and conveniences: Air conditioning in public area, Concierge, Daily housekeeping, Elevator, Luggage storage, Reception [24-hour].
For the little ones There were indeed Family/child friendly facilities.
The Downside?
- Consistent Staff Training: Some service staff were amazing! others seemed a little lost. A bit more consistency would go a long way.
Final Verdict: Could Have Been Paradise (But Wasn’t Quite)
"Escape to Paradise" in Cetraro? It's an experience. A slightly messy, occasionally frustrating, ultimately enjoyable experience. It's not quite paradise, but there are glimpses of it. With a few tweaks, and a bit more polish, this place could truly shine.
I'd rate it: A solid 3.5 out of 5 stars. Would I go back? Maybe. But next time, I am definitely bringing my own engineer to operate those windows.
Ski-In/Ski-Out Luxury: Your Dream Apartment in Kleinarl Awaits!
Alright, alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're not going for smooth sailing here. We're talking about Belvilla by Oyo Tuono in Cetraro, Italy, and you're getting the real, unfiltered, slightly-over-caffeinated version. This ain't your grandma's itinerary. This is my mess.
The Cetraro Catastrophe (Or, How I Learned to Love the Coast)
Day 1: Arrival and Existential Dread (But with Good Pasta)
- Morning (Maybe Early, Maybe Not): Arrive at Lamezia Terme Airport (SUF). Okay, so far, so good. Except the rental car place. Ugh. Always a test of patience. This time, the guy's English was…well, picture a mime trying to explain quantum physics. Eventually, we got the keys to a tiny, slightly-used Fiat. Named her "Calamity" immediately.
- Afternoon: Drive to Cetraro. The drive looks beautiful on paper. Cliffs, turquoise water, the works. In reality? Calamity's engine whined like a dying cat climbing a mountain, and I spent half the time gripping the wheel like a lifeline. My companion's expression, a mix of sheer terror and thinly veiled amusement, was the real highlight.
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: Arrive at Belvilla by Oyo Tuono. The photos lied. Okay, not lied, but definitely… embellished. It was…rustic. Let's call it that. The view, however, was breathtaking. Seriously. The Tyrrhenian Sea stretched out, shimmering under the golden hour light. Cue a massive wave of: "Holy shit, I'm actually here!" and the immediate need to change into bathing suits.
- Evening: Dinner at a local trattoria in Cetraro Marina. Finding a good restaurant always feels like you're doing investigative journalism. This place seemed promising, and it was. Pasta. We're talking the kind that you don't just eat, you experience. The simple flavors, the fresh pasta, the way the sauce clung… I had a moment. Like, a real, "I'm in Italy, I'm eating pasta, and life is good" kind of moment. I swear, I almost cried. Then I spilled red wine. Classic.
Day 2: Sun, Sea, and Serious Sunburn
- Morning: Attempts at lounging and the beach. The beach in Cetraro is made of pebbles, not sand. I was not prepared. Walking around with my bare feet was pain (and I have high pain tolerance). We find a little beach club that had sunbeds. Bliss. Until I decided to be an idiot and not reapply sunscreen. I now channel the color of a boiled lobster.
- Afternoon: Swimming in the crystal clear sea. The water was gorgeous, but ice cold and I jumped in the water and wanted to immediately get back out. This sounds silly, but it's freezing! After about a week I got used to this.
- Late Afternoon: Exploring Cetraro a bit. The old town is pretty, with its narrow winding streets, but I was still a bit hobbled from the sunburn. I decided to stop by the Gelateria!
- Evening: More pasta! (Surprise!). This time we went for seafood pasta. I also tested out some wines and was blown away.
Day 3: Coastline, and Unexpected Hiking
- Morning: Drive north along the coast. The view from the road, even if the road is a bit treacherous, is spectacular. We stopped at a random beach. The water was so clear. We brought beach gear, but we barely used it, just sat and stared (and I took a thousand photos!)
- Afternoon: This is where things get interesting. We saw a sign for a hiking trail, and because we didn't have a proper plan (a theme, apparently), we thought, "Why not?". Well, "why not" turned into a moderately challenging climb up a mountain with zero proper hiking shoes. The views were incredible! We saw a vulture, a goat, and a lot of sweat.
- Evening: The hike left us famished. Pizza and gelato! I have no regrets, but that hike really wiped us out.
Day 4: The Day the Car Died (Literally)
- Morning: We decided to go to a nearby town of Paola because of the incredible beaches. We got there in time, and decided to stop at the café. I saw a sign "Pasticceria" and I immediately ordered a "cornetto", which is the Italian equivalent of a croissant. So good.
- Afternoon: You know what is the worst? Calamity decided to give up the ghost. Middle of the road, engine sputtering, and a cloud of white smoke. I was having a meltdown.
- Rest of the Day: We called the rental car place, got a tow truck, and everything was a massive, slow, bureaucratic nightmare of Italian inefficiency. This is where my emotional reactions went straight to "rage black hole." After what seemed like an eternity, we finally got a replacement car. It was a better model, though.
Day 5: Rest and Renewal (Mostly Lying Down)
- All Day: I recovered from the car incident, the sunburn, and the general chaos of the week, by the pool. I read a book, swam, and did my best to maintain a Zen-like attitude.
- Evening: Another amazing dinner. Pasta, wine, the works. This time, I skipped the red wine, just in case.
Day 6: Farewell to Cetraro (And a Promise to Return)
- Morning: Last swim in the sea, last look at that view. The overwhelming sense of peace I felt made me realize how much I needed this trip.
- Afternoon: Drive to Lamezia Terme Airport. It's surprisingly emotional.
- Evening: That's it. So long, Cetraro. Despite the car drama, the sunburn, and the occasional existential crisis, it was perfect.
Final Thoughts:
Look, Belvilla by Oyo Tuono wasn't perfect. Neither was the car, or my planning skills. But Cetraro? Cetraro was pure magic. The food, the water, the people (mostly), the sheer, untamed beauty of it all… It got under my skin. I came back with a sunburn, a slightly frayed temper, and a heart that's a little bit Italian now. And, yeah, I'd go back in a heartbeat. Just, maybe, with a better car and a LOT more sunscreen. And maybe… I'll learn some Italian phrases before I arrive. Maybe.
Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Bungalow Awaits in Voorthuizen, Netherlands!
Okay, seriously, what's the deal with Cetraro and this "Dream Belvilla"? Is it actually paradise?
Alright, let's be real. Paradise? Look, it's Italy. It's got sunshine, pasta, and the general air of "chill" that makes everything better. Cetraro itself? A charming little town clinging to the Calabrian coast. Think narrow, winding streets that are *perfect* for getting gloriously lost in (and trust me, I did - constantly!), and the scent of lemons and the sea hanging heavy in the air. As for the Belvilla… well, that’s where the "Dream" part gets complicated. Let's just say my expectations were… high. Like, "Instagram influencer with a perfectly staged breakfast overlooking the Tyrrhenian Sea" high.
So, the Belvilla itself. What’s it *really* like? Should I pack my "live, laugh, love" sign?
Okay, the Belvilla. The pictures? Absolutely stunning. The reality? Inherently Italian: Charmingly flawed. My first impression was… *wow, this terrace is bigger than my apartment!* Seriously, the view was breathtaking. But then the Wi-Fi died. Immediately. And the air conditioning sounded like a dying walrus. (Seriously, the one in the living room was particularly dramatic). It wasn't perfect. There were a few cobwebs in the corner (look, it *is* a mountain house!), and a rogue ant made a valiant attempt at conquering my biscotti stash. But… the location? The sun setting over the water, the smell of grilled fish wafting up from the harbor… it got me. It really got me. I did *not* pack a "live, laugh, love" sign but, maybe, I should have.
What about the food? Is it as amazing as everyone says? Because I'm ready to gain 10 pounds.
Oh. My. GOD. Prepare yourself. Pack the stretchy pants. Ten pounds? Honey, you *might* gain ten pounds in the *first day*. The food in Cetraro is… well, it's a love affair. Seriously. From the simplest pasta with fresh tomatoes and basil (which is what I had for lunch, like, every day) to the incredibly fresh seafood, it’s all just… *chef's kiss*. One night, we stumbled upon a tiny trattoria run by a little old Nonna who looked like she'd seen a few things. BEST. MEAL. EVER. We didn't understand half of what she was saying, but the food… the food spoke for itself. Just, be prepared to loosen the belt buckle. And maybe learn a few Italian phrases, like "un altro piatto, per favore" (another plate, please). You’ll need it.
Any specific recommendations for Cetraro itself? What should I *absolutely* do?
Okay, listen up. First, get lost in the town. Seriously. Wander the cobblestone streets, peek into the little shops (the ceramics are gorgeous), and just soak in the atmosphere. The beach? Pristine. Go swimming, sunbathe (slather on the sunscreen!), and just… *be*. The harbour is alive with the fishermen returning and the fishmongers setting up the restaurants . Find an outdoor table and people-watch with an Aperol Spritz. The Castello (castle) has incredible views, and the church… well, I spent an hour there one day, just marvelling at the architecture and the quiet. It also offers amazing sea views from the top. Honestly, just breathe. It’s about the slowing down, and enjoying the moment.
So, the downsides? Because there's *always* a catch, right?
Ugh, yes. Of course. Let's be honest, Italy is not perfect, and neither is this Belvilla! The initial scramble to get to the place was a bit stressful. There was some confusion with the key pick-up (thank God for the Italian language skills I learned from watching The Godfather!), and the road to the house is a bit… let's say "adventurous." Especially if you're used to driving on the autobahn. Then, the Wi-Fi. Did I mention the Wi-Fi? It loved to take naps, especially when you desperately needed to upload that perfect sunset photo (priorities!). And the mosquitos. They were vicious. Bring bug spray. Seriously. Lots and lots of bug spray. And be prepared for the occasional power outage (part of the charm, apparently? I'm still not entirely convinced).
Is it good for families?
Absolutely! Families with kids thrive in Cetraro. The beach is perfectly safe and shallow for kids to enjoy and the locals are brilliant with children. The pace of life is so relaxed, and there is enough space at this Belvilla that all guests are safe and happy. The food is also a very big selling point, no matter how picky your children may be, I guarantee there will be something for them to enjoy!
How about accessibility? Are there issues getting around if you're not super mobile?
This is a tricky one. Cetraro itself is *very* hilly. The streets are cobbled, and there are a lot of steps. The Belvilla itself, from what I saw, had a few steps to get to certain areas, so it may not be ideal for people with mobility issues. It's worth contacting Belvilla or the owner to check the specifics on that, as the older parts of town were not designed with modern accessibility in mind (and neither are the buildings!). The beach access is generally ok, as there's a wide paved path. It pays to research ahead of time.
Okay, so you've been there. The Big Question: Would you go back?
Without a doubt. Despite the dodgy Wi-Fi, the anti-walrus air con, and the mosquito apocalypse, yes, I would go back. Because amidst the imperfections, there's a magic in Cetraro. There's the feeling of being utterly and completely *away*. There's the taste of sun-ripened tomatoes and the sound of the waves. There's the warmth of the people and the joy of just *being*. It’s not a flawless paradise, but damn, it’s a pretty good slice of heaven. And hey, maybe the Wi-Fi will have improved by then! (A girl can dream, right?).
