Anhee, Belgium: Your Dream Country Escape Awaits!
Anhee, Belgium: Your Dream Country Escape… Maybe? (A Review from Someone Who Actually Went)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I'm about to spill the tea on Anhee, Belgium. "Your Dream Country Escape Awaits!" the brochure chirps. Dreamy? Maybe. Escape? Definitely. But let's just say my experience wasn’t quite the rose-tinted fairytale they promised. This is a messy review, the kind you’d write after downing a few too many Belgian beers, and trust me, I did.
First Impressions: Accessibility (and My Slightly Clumsy Entrance)
So, first things first: Accessibility. I'm happy to report that, from what I saw, Anhee tries. There's an elevator, which is a lifesaver, and they boast facilities for disabled guests, but honestly, navigating the cobbled streets around the edges of the hotel (which, let's be real, is what you're there for) felt a little like an obstacle course. More like a very scenic obstacle course. Getting around is a little tricky.
Getting There & Getting Around:
- Airport transfer? Yep! Another win.
- Car park [free of charge]? Hooray! Free parking is always a win, especially when you realize the closest public transport involves befriending a local pigeon with a GPS watch and a strong desire to travel.
- Taxi service? Present and accounted for. Although, the cab ride from Namur felt like it took longer than my own marriage. (Just kidding, honey! Mostly.)
Internet - The Modern-Age Necessity (or How I Nearly Threw My Laptop Out the Window)
Alright, let's talk about the bane of every modern traveler's existence: Internet. The brochure boasts Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!. Hallelujah! And, for the most part, it worked. But… the bandwidth was a little… glacial. Trying to upload photos of the stunning countryside felt like watching paint dry in slow motion. And streaming anything? Forget about it. I'm pretty sure dial-up internet from the 90s had a faster response than this. But at least Wi-Fi is available in public areas. Silver lining, I guess. I should have used an Internet [LAN] connection if I want speed!
Safety First (or, Did I Actually Feel Safe?)
Cleanliness and safety are, understandably, a big deal these days. And Anhee seems to take it seriously. Plenty of Hand sanitizer stations, and I spotted Staff trained in safety protocol. They also had Anti-viral cleaning products, and daily Daily disinfection in common areas for your peace of mind. They've also got CCTV in common areas and CCTV outside property. I felt pretty safe, though you could argue a better internet connection would be even more comforting.
Rooms - The Good, the Bad, and the Extremely Belgian
Okay, let's get into the nitty-gritty of the rooms, the alleged heart of any "dream escape." Mine? Well, let's start with the good: Air conditioning (essential!), Blackout curtains (bliss after those long Belgian sunsets). And the bathtub? Glorious. I soaked in bubbles, pretending to be a sophisticated European socialite. (I'm not, but a girl can dream.)
The not-so-good? The Internet access – wireless (see above), the somewhat depressing carpet, and the overall, distinctly beige décor. Daily housekeeping helped, but even they couldn't make my room feel less…beige. Non-smoking rooms, thank goodness. Also, the presence of an extra long bed was welcome!
On-site amenities:
- Bathroom phone: I'm guessing that's for emergencies. (Or dramatic phone calls.)
- Bathtub: Oh, yes. Bubbles. I need more bubbles in my life.
- Coffee/tea maker: Essential for facing the day…and my own crankiness.
- Hair dryer: Praise be!
- In-room safe box: Always a good idea. Because Belgian chocolates can be expensive.
- Ironing facilities: I used them. Mostly to iron my face.
- Mini bar: Temptation central!
- Refrigerator: For my water. Because…beige.
- Satellite/cable channels: I couldn't figure the remote out.
- Shower: Functional. Nothing to write home about.
- Slippers: Comfy!
- Soundproofing: A godsend, especially if you're near the bar.
- Telephone: For calling room service and ordering more bubbles.
- Toiletries: Basic, but you get the job done
- Towels: Clean and fluffy.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Fueling the Adventures (and the Existential Questions)
Okay, food. This is where Anhee truly shines…and also stumbles.
- Restaurants: Several, all specializing in authentic Belgian cuisine.
- A la carte in restaurant: Options!
- Bar: This is the heart of the hotel. And where I spent a considerable amount of time getting to know the various flavors of Belgian beer. Highly recommend.
- Breakfast [buffet]: A decent spread. But, and this is a BIG but, the coffee was… well, let's just say it wasn't the caffeinated ambrosia I needed after a night of beers.
- Coffee/tea in restaurant: Better than the buffet coffee, but still not enough to win me over.
- Room service [24-hour]: Lifesaver after a long day of sightseeing (or, more accurately, beer-tasting).
- Snack bar: Useful for those midnight cravings.
- Western cuisine in restaurant: Yes, and it’s good.
Things to Do: Relaxation and Diversions
This is where Anhee claims to excel. Let's break it down.
- Spa: Yes! A legit Spa, complete with Sauna, Steamroom, and a Pool with view - I mean, COME ON! They also had the works. Seriously, this was a highlight.
- Body scrub, Body wrap: I indulged, and honestly, felt like a new person.
- Massage: The best massage I've ever had, by far. I swear, they melted my stresses away.
- Foot bath: Pampered is an understatement.
- Fitness center, Gym/fitness: I peeked in, but let's just say my idea of "fitness" involves walking to the bar.
- Swimming pool [outdoor, indoor]: Both looked inviting, but I was too busy swimming in beer.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things (and the Big Ones)
- Air conditioning in public area: Essential!
- Concierge: Helpful and friendly. They knew the best places to find a good beer (again, essential!).
- Daily housekeeping: My savior!
- Elevator: Yay!
- Food delivery: Perfect for those lazy days in the room.
- Laundry service, Dry cleaning, Ironing service: All available, and reasonably priced.
- Luggage storage: Handy, especially if you're like me and pack everything but the kitchen sink.
- Safety deposit boxes: Another good idea. Keep your valuable Belgian chocolates safe!
- Cashless payment service: Convenient and a must-have nowadays!
For the Kids… or Not?
I don't have kids, but I noticed there were Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal available.
In Conclusion (or, Was it Actually a Dream?)
Anhee, Belgium? It has potential. It's clean, the staff is lovely, and the spa is phenomenal. The food is mostly good. But let's be real: the internet is awful, the decor could use a refresh, and getting around isn't always a breeze.
So, is it your dream country escape? That depends on your definition of "dream." If your dream is a perfectly polished, flawlessly efficient getaway, then maybe not. But if your dream is a charming, slightly quirky, and undeniably beautiful place to relax, unwind, and maybe overindulge in Belgian beer while getting the best massage of your life? Then, yeah, Anhee might just be your dream come true. I'd go back. But I'd definitely bring a hotspot, a power strip, and a serious appreciation for beige.
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Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to embark on a whirlwind tour of my supposed "relaxing" trip to that charmingly renovated country house in Anhee, Belgium. Let's see if "charm" and "relaxing" actually survive intact… or if I become a blubbering mess of jet lag and questionable cheese.
Anhee Adventure: A Sort-Of-Itinerary (More Like a Wing and a Prayer)
Day 1: Arrival & Existential Dread (aka "The Drive from Brussels: A Study in Patience")
- 10:00 AM (ish): Touchdown in Brussels. I swear, the airport humidity alone practically glued me to my seat. Already feeling the "are we there yet?" vibes, even though we are the "we" doing the traveling.
- 11:00 AM: Rental car drama. You know, the classic: The car they promised wasn't what they described. (Spoiler alert, I think I may be driving a sentient lawnmower) Then the obligatory, "Sir, do you really understand how THIS car works?" from the bored clerk. Note to self: Invest in a driver's Ed refresher course.
- 12:30 PM: The drive begins! Navigation is a battle. GPS voice that is apparently incapable of understanding the simple difference between "left" and "right". Every decision is a lottery. "Oh good, more roundabouts." (I'm pretty sure I've driven a full circle at one point, only to end up staring back at the same sign.)
- 2:00 PM: "Scenic stops" for my lunch. It was a baguette and some questionable deli meat purchased from a petrol station shop. The scenery? Fields. Lots and lots of fields. Contemplating philosophy and nature. Was it worth it? I am not sure.
- 4:00 PM: Finally! Anhee. The country house. This place is actually more gorgeous than the pictures. Like, seriously, the kind of place you want to move into and never leave. The renovation team did an absolutely astounding job.
- 4:30 PM: Key retrieval – The lady running the place had to leave the key behind, for the first time. The door… did not immediately open. Panic! I am locked out of the gorgeous country house! With no phone reception! The existential dread sets in -- the trip begins and ends right here! But, with some maneuvering (and a lot of swearing), the door finally relented. Sweet victory.
- 5:00 PM: Settling in. I feel like a character in a rom-com where they're searching for their soulmate, but instead, I'm just looking for the light switch and a working WiFi signal.
- 6:00 PM: Dinner and a moment of stillness: I made a simple dinner of pasta and some vegetables from the local market, trying to embrace the calm. The only sound is the chirping of some unseen insects and my own thoughts (the insects are much more peaceful).
Day 2: Exploring & The Great Gouda Conspiracy (AKA, "Did I Just Accidentally Join a Cult of Cheese?")
- 9:00 AM: Wake up. Sunlight streaming through the window. Actually feeling rested! A miracle! (The bed is pure heaven, and I've decided to marry it.)
- 10:00 AM: A walk through the surrounding village. Cobblestone streets, ancient churches, sheep grazing placidly. I'm officially in a postcard.
- 11:30 AM: The local market. Okay, so I went a bit crazy. I emerged with a basket of cheeses, bread that tastes like the gods themselves baked it, and a bottle of local wine. I've named it "Chaos Basket"!
- 12:30 PM: Cheese-apalooza! I spent the afternoon in a delicious haze of gouda, brie, and some mystery cheese that tasted suspiciously like heaven. I may have inadvertently consumed a whole wheel. I suspect I blacked out at some point.
- 3:00 PM: A hike! Feeling a bit over-cheesed, a walk in the woods is necessary. Got slightly lost. The trees are very good at misleading. Came across an abandoned stone wall. Thinking. A great amount of thinking.
- 5:00 PM: Back to the house. Reading a book. Staring. Daydreaming. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to accomplish, and I am not sure I care.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner. More leftovers, more wine. Deciding cheese is a legitimate food group.
Day 3: The Abbey & The Belgian Chocolate Trauma (Or, My Sweet Tooth's Requiem)
- 9:00 AM: Wake up. Regret the wine consumption.
- 10:00 AM: Visit to the local abbey. It's stunning. The architecture, the history, the general sense of serenity. It might have been the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch! Okay, so I stopped taking photos. I sat in a café. This is where the magic is.
- 2:00 PM: Chocolate shop. A shop stocked from floor to ceiling with gleaming, beautiful chocolates. I'm getting excited.
- 2:15 PM: I sample a praline. It was not good. It was too sweet. And then I try another. Even worse. I think I cried for a moment. My expectations were too high.
- 3:30 PM: Comfort chocolate! I walk to the local shop and get some chocolate anyway.
- 4:00 PM: Back to the house. Staring out the window. Contemplating the meaning of life. The meaning of chocolate. Have a cup of tea.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner. Pasta again!
Day 4: Departure & The Longing for Gouda (or, "I'm Leaving My Heart in Anhee")
- 9:00 AM: Packing. Hating it. Want to stay.
- 10:00 AM: Last breakfast. One last bit of bread and cheese. (Of course.)
- 11:00 AM: Final walk around the house. Saying goodbye to the bed, the light switches, and the general peace.
- 12:00 PM: The drive back to Brussels. More roundabouts. More GPS battles. More existential musings.
- 2:00 PM: Brussels. Airport. Departure.
- On the plane: Already homesick for that beautiful country house. And the cheese, oh, the cheese… I'm pretty sure I left a piece of my soul in Anhee.
Final Thoughts: This wasn't just a trip; it was an adventure. It was messy, imperfect, and occasionally infused with blind panic and profound cheese-related disappointment. But it was mine. And I wouldn't trade it for all the perfectly curated Instagram feeds in the world. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go find a decent cheese shop… just in case I can find my way back to paradise.
Escape to Paradise: Luxurious Vielsalm Chalet with HUGE Garden!
Anhee, Belgium: Seriously, My Dream Country Escape... Maybe Yours Too? (A Messy FAQ)
Okay, Okay, What *IS* Anhee, Anyway? Like, Brussels, Right? Wrong.
Alright, deep breaths. Anhee. It's not Brussels. Not even close. Picture this: you're tired of the concrete jungle. You've had it with the crowds, the noise, the people who think "personal space" is a suggestion. Anhee is the antidote. It's a little commune, in the heart of Belgium, basically a tiny village nestled in the Namur province. It's the kind of place where the air smells like... well, actual air! And you can *hear* the air – the whisper of the wind, the rustle of leaves, the occasional moo of a perfectly happy cow. (And you *will* hear them. Guaranteed).
I stumbled upon it by accident, honestly. Needed a spontaneous get away, and the images took me out of misery, I was instantly hooked. Didn’t even research it properly. Turns out, that’s the best way to do it. Expectations: tossed out the window. Reality: far better.
Getting There: The Train! The Bus! My Sanity!
Okay, transport. Not as straightforward as a bullet train to Tokyo. But also, not the logistical nightmare of, say, navigating the New York City subway on a Saturday night after a few too many beers. (Personal experience, not recommended). The train is your friend. From Brussels, take a train to Dinant, then get to the village. Bus, taxis... Honestly? Renting a car is the best option. It gives you freedom to explore ALL the nooks and crannies (trust me, you want to explore those nooks – some of the best hidden gems are tucked away!).
My first time? Let's just say I took a *very* scenic route because I thought I knew better than Google Maps. Ended up hiking for miles, lost, but found a ridiculously charming old pub with the BEST local beer I've ever tasted. So, you know... win-win?
Food Glorious Food! (And Did I Gain Ten Pounds?)
Prepare to loosen your belt. Seriously. Belgian food is… well, it's a hug from the earth. Rich, hearty, and filled with deliciousness. Anhee itself isn't exactly a Michelin-star destination (though I wouldn't be surprised if someone opens one up soon – the potential is HUGE!). But the surrounding villages are a goldmine of culinary delights. Think: fluffy frites (seriously, the best fries *ever*), rich stews, creamy sauces, and enough chocolate to satisfy Willy Wonka himself.
My biggest mistake? Underestimating the portion sizes. I swear, I ordered a "small" portion of moules frites one time and nearly needed a crane to lift me out of the restaurant. Worth it, though. Absolutely, unequivocally worth it.
Things to Do: Hike! Bike! Drink Beer Repeatedly! (My Ideal Vacation)
Okay, activities. Let's be real, Anhee isn't exactly the Las Vegas of Belgium. But that's the point! It's about slowing down, breathing deeply, and appreciating the simple things. Hiking trails abound – gorgeous, winding paths through rolling hills, past ancient ruins, and alongside the Meuse River. Biking is fantastic too. The landscape is stunning. If you've got a bike! (I didn't, first time, and regretted every pedal-less moment). The beer? Well, Belgium is famous for its beer. And the local breweries are a must-visit. Be warned: they are strong. Pace yourself (and maybe bring a designated driver... or hire one of those fancy horse-drawn carriages to take you home. I’m not judging.)
Accommodation: Hotels? B&Bs? Can I Just Sleep in a Field?
Options vary. You’re not going to find rows of gleaming high-rise hotels. Thank goodness. It's small-town charm all the way. B&Bs are your best bet: charming, welcoming, and usually run by lovely locals who'll happily share their insider tips (and maybe a glass of wine or two). Holiday homes... you can definitely find them. I've stayed in some truly magical places, and some... well, let's just say they could use a bit of an update. Read reviews! And, no, sleeping in a field probably isn't advisable unless you're incredibly hardy (and prepared for some curious cows).
The Language Barrier: Do I Need to Speak French? (Help!)
Definitely a heads-up on this one. The area is mostly French-speaking. Yes, you *can* get by with English in tourist areas, but trust me on this: learning a few basic French phrases will significantly enhance your experience. “Bonjour”, “Merci”, “S'il vous plaît”, “Un verre de bière, s'il vous plaît!”… These phrases will go a long way. I remember trying to order a sandwich without any French and the poor shopkeeper looked at me like I was a Martian. I managed a pointing, stuttering mess that somehow resulted in a delicious sandwich (bacon, cheese, and a baguette that had me in heaven). The locals are generally very patient and happy to help. Just make an effort.
That One Time I Got Utterly, Completely, and Ridiculously Lost (The "Best" Day Ever)
Okay, buckle up. This is the good stuff. This is a story I'll be laughing about until the day I shuffle off this mortal coil. It was my second trip to Anhee. I fancied myself a seasoned explorer. I'd rented a car. I had a map (yes, a paper one! Remember those?). I was going to conquer the local trails. I thought.
I chose a route that took me through the most "scenic" parts of the countryside - through tiny villages, over winding roads, following the little signs which you blink and miss, but felt so free at the time. Which would be great, normally, but... well, I have a terrible, *terrible* sense of direction. I managed to get lost almost immediately. Like, within 15 minutes. The road became significantly smaller and the signposts looked, for lack of a better word, “uncooperative.” I figured, "Hey, adventure! I'll find a way!" Cue the existential dread.
Hours passed. I drove up and down tiny roads. I asked for directions (badly, in a mixture of English, French and charades). I started to question my life choices. I was hungry. I was thirsty. I saw one old woman shaking her head at the state of my car as I attempted to ask for help.
Then, glory! I stumbled upon a teeny, tiny village that looked like it had been plucked straight out of a fairytale. Cobblestone streets, flowers spilling from window boxes, and a pub that looked like it hadn't changed since the 17th century. I went in, ordered a beer (thank GOD for the helpful barkeep who spoke some English), and ate the most amazing plate of frites IAround The World Hotels
